I'm not saying I agree with it. It's just that bird law in this country—it's not governed by reason.

Character Name: Kristoffer Belau
Level: 27
Race: Human
Gender: Male
Height: 6’3″
Weight: 190
Alignment: Lawful Evil (Marketing)
Languages: English, Latin, Business, Philosopher
Class: Internet Marketing Manager
Hit Points:42

Attributes:
Strength – 16 (+3)
Constitution – 14 (+2)
Dexterity – 8 (-1)
Intelligence – 13 (+1)
Wisdom – 10 (0)
Charisma – 12 (+1)

Saves:
Fortitude – +12
Reflex – +2
Will – +18

Grapple Modifier – +10

Speed – 7

Base Attack Bonus – +6

Attacks:
Basic Melee attack: +8 1d8+6 damage
Basic Ranged Attack: +2 1d4+2 damage

Feats:
Argumentative
- You are a generally argumentative jerk. +4 on Diplomacy checks made after people get tired of dealing with you.

Blue Belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu
- Your grappling skills are better than most, but you probably think way more of you skills than reality. +5 on Grapple checks, -5 on bluff checks to avoid a fight.

Spammer
- That’s a fancy black hat you got there. Your alignment must be evil, you gain +5 on knowledge (SEM) or Thievery checks made to arbitrage.

Stressed
- WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING TO CLICK OUT RATE!?! You gain a +1 bonus to speed while running around the office like a crazy man. -5 penalty on fortitude checks to avoid a heart attack.

Leadership
- For some reason people do what you tell them to. You gain a team, but one of them complains all the time.

Skills:
Acrobatics: -2
Athletics: +8
Bluff: +8
Diplomacy:+6
Dungeoneering: +0
Endurance: +7
Heal: +0
History: +5
Insight: +4
Intimidate: +9
Nature: +0
Perception: +1
Religion: +4
Stealth: -4
Streetwise: +0
Thievery: +6

Equipment:
- iPhone of Too Many Apps +2
- Desk of Holding +4
- Hoodie of Bad Fashion Sense +3
- iPad of Achievement +5
- Sonic Screwdriver
- Black Hat